This morning, I went shopping to get some bits before going to my physiotherapy appointment at the hospital. We just happened to stop for petrol on the way there, when the car broke down...
I got really upset as I thought I wasn't going to make my appointment, and if you miss your appointment, you get discharged from therapy which obviously, I'm not ready to do yet.
Long story short, my Godmother came to get me from where we'd broken down and drove me to the hospital where the traffic was at a standstill so she took a 'shortcut' and dropped me off... The problem being, that she dropped me off about 1/4 mile away from the building that I had to go to. I was in no position to tell her that I couldn't walk that far as I was just grateful that she'd got me there, but then came possibly the biggest struggle of my life.
I hopped the whole way on my crutches. My good leg and my arms were both buckling under my weight due to my joint problems and I was crying in pain, but I had no choice but to carry on. By the time I got to the front door of the centre, I had no breath at all and felt faint. I still had three corridors to go yet. I managed to get through the revolving door without toppling over like I thought I was going to, but trying to pull and hold open a very heavy wooden door whilst balancing on my crutches was the hardest part. How many people offered to help me, to hold the door open for me? A big fat zero.
By the time I got to the physiotherapy department and hobbled over to reception, I was so out of breath that I couldn't even answer the receptionist. If you know me, you'll know that I never get breathless. I can do an hour and a half of solid singing and dancing with quick changes in between each number and not get out of breath, so for me to get breathless is a big deal. Anyway, I threw my appointment card at him and wheezed an apology. He looked quite concerned for me and told me to go and rest.
It was only a few minutes before my physiotherapist, Lauren, called me in. She said I looked like I'd been crying and asked me why. I explained the whole situation to her and she said it was obvious that I'd done too much on my crutches, so she wouldn't make me do too much today.
I had to show her the exercises that she'd given me last week. She was so impressed with how much I could straighten my leg compared to last week with little pain. She then got me to bend my knee up and at first, I went straight to the measurement of 65. (Last week, the further I could get was 60.) She felt my knee and said it was very tight. She gave me a thorough and quite painful massage, then got me to try again. She kept doing this and every time, I managed to go a bit further. By the end of the session, I'd gone from 60 to 100 in just one week. She said this was amazing progress and that she was really proud of me.
I asked her if she knows when I would be able to walk again and she got me to walk on my crutches to show her. That's when she told me that not only had my quadriceps muscle died, but my calf one has too. She told me to concentrate on my exercises rather than walking, and that the walking will come 'one day' which doesn't sound too positive.
Exercises to practice after week two:1. Massaging my own leg in the tense areas, as I have 'knots' in my knee and leg, similar to what you get in your shoulders only more painful.
2. Pushing my kneecap towards me - a special exercise that she shown me.
3. Putting something under my knee and a towel around my flexed foot to pull my foot towards me, then gradually reducing the size of the item underneath my knee until my leg will go flat on the bed with a flexed foot as well as a pointed or relaxed one.
I know some of that isn't good news but I'm trying to focus on the fact that my knee bend has improved so much since last week. I can do this.
Clare
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xxx
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